Yoda Was Wrong
I’m risking nerd exile by even suggesting this but…I think Yoda was wrong.
In The Empire Strikes Back, Luke Skywalker travels to the swampy planet of Dagobah to find Jedi Master Yoda. Luke’s X-Wing ends up sunk in a bog, and Luke doesn’t think he can get it out.
Yoda tells him the only difference between moving the ship and moving stones is the one in his mind. With a shrug, Luke turns back and says, “Alright, I’ll give it a try.”
Yoda replies, “Try not. Do, or do not. There is no try.”
In his post “The Difference between Trying and Doing,” Michael Hyatt, Chairman of Thomas Nelson Publishers, talks about how he watched self-help author Tony Robbins use a chair to explain this concept. Robbins asked a woman to try to pick up the chair. When she picked it up, he told her she’d done it wrong. He asked her to try to pick it up, not to actually pick it up. When she left the chair in place, he told her that she wasn’t trying—she was simply not picking it up.
Hyatt goes on to explain, “The point is that when we say we are trying we don’t really have to do anything. It also provides us with an excuse for why we didn’t accomplish the outcome we say we want. Do you understand the difference? You either do something or you don’t do it. Trying is really the same as not doing it. It just makes it easier for us to let ourselves off the hook when we fail.”
Sometimes we do use I’ll try as an excuse. In some situations, there really is only a “do or do not.” You either exercise three times a week or you don’t. You either cheat on your spouse or you don’t. You either write or you don’t. Simple. You can’t try any more than the woman could try to pick up the chair.
But sometimes you can try. Sometimes trying is the best you can do.
(I know. I’m taking on Yoda and Michael Hyatt. I must be crazy.)
When Another Person Is Involved
Say someone was sitting on the chair in question. You might strain and plead, but the chair won’t move. Isn’t there a legitimate try in that case? You gave your all, but someone prevented you from accomplishing what you set out to do.
What about the spouse who goes to counseling, puts in to practice techniques to improve communication, and finds ways to truly show love to their husband or wife to save a troubled marriage, but their husband or wife walks away anyway?
They did everything they could to save their marriage, but someone else’s decision prevented them doing it.
When An Innate Ability Or Talent Is Involved
I’m 5-foot-2, and I’m strong for my size. But if you placed a 1,000-pound chair in front of me and told me to lift it, I couldn’t do it. I am physically incapable of lifting something that size alone.
As a child, I loved to sing. I sang every day. I still do. But it wouldn’t matter how many hours I practiced or how many lessons I took or how determined I was to become a professional singer, I don’t have the voice for it. I wasn’t born with it. No amount of determination can change that. (Want more proof? Look at some of the people who try out for American Idol.)
A neurosurgeon needs steady hands. What if you have a condition that causes yours to shake, and that no amount of physical therapy can rectify? Did you fail because your mindset was wrong? Or should you be applauded for trying to reach your dream even though you failed?
When It Just Isn’t Meant to Be
Occasionally the chair is just built into the floor.
As my husband was nearing the end of his five-year commitment to the Marine Corps, he submitted paperwork to go to the Navy, with the goal of eventually becoming a chaplain. He did everything right and believed he was working toward his goal. Three days after he submitted his paperwork, he had a stroke, resulting in his eventual discharge from the military and a medical ban on rejoining.
Some things just aren’t meant to be. Should a person be told to keep driving toward a dream that clearly isn’t going to happen? I think a time comes when we have to admit failure, grieve, and move on. To me, that’s a sign of true courage.
Saying “there is no try” implies we’re able to do anything if we set our minds to it. And that’s a lie. Sometimes we fail, and the value is in the trying rather than in the success.
We learn through trying and failing. We learn patience, persistence. We learn how to graciously accept defeat. We learn we had skills and strengths we didn’t dream of before. We also learn what isn’t right for us.
People who try, really try, give it their all, and fail, should be applauded. Their mindset was right. They fought hard. “Do or do not” just wasn’t an option.
Do you agree with me that Yoda was wrong (in this case at least)? Or do you still think Yoda was right?
Mar 15, 2012 @ 08:36:55
I think that’s taking it too literally.
It’s to do with mental outlook rather than the end result. If you go into a task saying “Okay, I’ll give it a try” then you’re allowing yourself to keep the idea of failure in your mind, just like Luke was doing in that scene. When you let the idea of failure take seed, it can restrict you. That part of our brain going “I might not succeed, so it’s okay not to give it my all” keeps you from performing to the best of your abilities.
However, if you go into something saying “I will DO this,” then you are mentally geared for success. It might happen right away. It might take several attempts. It might come in a way you weren’t expecting. Or it might not come at all. Whether you succeed or not isn’t the issue. It’s giving yourself the right mental outlook to see the opportunities for success as they present themselves.
Mar 15, 2012 @ 15:45:20
You make a very good point about sending a subconscious message to our minds that it’s okay to fail. Our minds can hold us back if we let the idea of failure take root, but it can be just as paralyzing to give your all and have someone tell you that you failed because your mindset wasn’t right. That’s what I find to be sad.
Mar 15, 2012 @ 08:48:41
I think you are right. If we think that we can’t try new things because we have to go all the way and do it, there are so many things I would never try. It’s like with kids we tell them to take three bites and try it. Sometimes they discover they love it. And they never would have known until they tried. Sure, there are things that trying doesn’t seem to accomplish. Writing may be one of those. You either write or you don’t. But from what I’ve heard it takes a lot of trying to get an agent, and even more to get a book deal. But it’s easy for me to disagree with Yoda because I’m not a Star Wars fan. Actually, I slept through most of it.
Mar 15, 2012 @ 13:12:49
Great example of kids trying a new food. Back when I was in university, I wanted to learn to fence, but I was hesitant because the fencing club ran two nights a week and you had to pay for six months at a time. I found out they offered a trial where you could take one class just to see what you thought first. I tried it. I liked it. And I did end up committing to six months.
Writing is a do or do not, but getting an agent does take a lot of trying and learning.
Mar 15, 2012 @ 09:24:30
Marcy, sometimes you post things and I feel like you are in my brain. 🙂
“Try” isn’t always a cop out. Your break down of ways we can try and still not “do” is totally on point. Thank you!
Mar 15, 2012 @ 15:38:15
The feeling is mutual 🙂 Your “out of sorts” post today really hit home.
Mar 15, 2012 @ 10:20:53
Put this way, your definition makes more sense! Yoda’s pithy quote was more about having the right frame of mind in attempting something that is doable, but will take work and won’t be easy. “Do or do not” is more a matter of, either put your all into it and make an honest attempt, or don’t bother. Because yes, it’s possible to give something your all and still fail!
Mar 15, 2012 @ 15:39:10
Precisely. I think what often gets overlooked is that Luke had the ability and nothing else was standing in his way. All he needed was a mental push.
Mar 15, 2012 @ 10:37:49
I understand what Paul is saying and agree, but that is more about how we approach a goal, not the thing itself. I agree with you, Marcy, that trying is an important intermediary step in dealing with things we cannot control, and that to dismiss a person’s best efforts just because they failed is wrong.
However, I don’t think it’s just about ‘meant to be’ stuff. Some goals are more verb than noun. Their very nature requires patient and consistent ‘trying’ –like writing a book. And with a dance background I relate more to the intermediary stages of approaching a goal, knowing you might have to ‘try’ something over and over again, working to improve it each time, before you can actually ‘do’ it.
Mar 15, 2012 @ 15:47:07
Well said. Writing a book for publication is very much about trying different things, figuring out which ones work and which ones don’t, and then trying again. That trying, in the end, is what allows the “do.”
Mar 15, 2012 @ 11:17:11
I kinda hate that Yoda quote. Because I don’t like to promise something I’m not 95% sure I can do. If I promise my kiddos we’ll go to the park tomorrow and it rains…they’re still at the age where they’ll be mad at me a little for not keeping my promise.
If somebody asks me to meet them at a certain time but it’s close to another appointment, I have to tell them I’ll “try” to make it and I will try. But traffic and timing may not be on my side.
I say “try” is legitimate when you really mean it. If it’s just a way of fobbing people off, then it’s a lie. And it’s the “lying” aspect that hangs me back from making “I’ll do it” promises all over the place. Whenever I see a possible giant snag to the “doing” I have to say “I’ll try.”
I could be looking at it wrong though.
Mar 16, 2012 @ 22:07:02
I think you’re looking at it just right in fact. My husband once told me that one of the things that made him fall in love with me is that I didn’t promise things unless I was certain I could do them. If I wasn’t certain, I always said I’d try my best. I think that’s actually a good rule to live by.
Mar 15, 2012 @ 11:24:00
I love your “nerdiness,” Marcy. (NERD: Neato, Eternally Rad Dear! ;)) I wish I knew more about Yoda… Based on this post, I agree with you. He was wrong, in this case.
I love that you addressed ‘I’ll try’ as an excuse. Don’t try, do. While we aren’t always capable, our goals are doable as long as we set realistic goals.
Mar 16, 2012 @ 22:07:52
I love your definition of nerd! Thank you bunches!
Mar 15, 2012 @ 11:57:16
You could subsitute “attempt” for “try”. There are many things we attempt that just don’t work out to be the way we envisioned them or just don’t happen even though we wanted them to.
So yes, we do sometimes try.
Mar 15, 2012 @ 12:41:57
That Yoda quote is kind of polarizing. It works in that context: “let your mind free,” and yada, yada (or, yoda, yoda? 😉
I agree with you. Sometimes we give our best, and it doesn’t work out. Does it mean we didn’t try? Of course not. I tell my kids: “just do your best.” The outcome, in these cases, is almost irrelevant. What else could we do?
I didn’t know about Chris, Marcy. I hope he had a full recovery.
Mar 15, 2012 @ 14:49:37
Thanks, Fabio. He has a few lingering side effects (numbness in a couple of his fingers), but overall, he was one of the lucky ones.
Mar 15, 2012 @ 13:42:26
Yikes. I’m one of those geeks that has to defend Yoda, even with what happened to your hubby. I feel the quote is about a person’s frame of mind. “Try” tends to be a CYA term. I think in your hubby’s case, it’s more of the “Do or Do not.” The thing is, we can only try so long before we either do or do not. The “try” is the journey. The “do or do not” is the destination. For your hubby, “Do not” was the destination. It is not a reflection of his “try” but the limitations placed upon him the military. For your example, he could not become a military chaplain but he could be a civilian chaplain that works with military families. What did he end up doing post military duty? In regards to the chair example, by yourself, no you probably can’t move a 1000 lbs. chair. But given the right tools, you might be able to.
Mar 15, 2012 @ 14:59:43
I’m glad you felt comfortable enough to disagree! I love a good back-and-forth. My husband would actually agree with you. He reads my posts before they go live, and we had a lot of fun debating our sides of the issue. Clearly he didn’t change my mind, but I didn’t change his either 🙂 His take is that, in the end, it all eventually comes down to did or didn’t.
Post-military he went on to work as a contractor for the US government, and now that he’s immigrated to Canada (to be with me), is looking into either a career as a police officer or prosecuting attorney. What he found out in hindsight was that chaplaincy wouldn’t have been the best career for him.
Mar 15, 2012 @ 15:15:14
Nice. 🙂 I’m glad it worked out in the end.
Mar 16, 2012 @ 05:33:14
I had to reply, Ryan, because you really creatively thought about this. I believe your point about trying as the journey, the process we take to do something, is perhaps a better description of the what Yoda was trying to say. We can always try to do something, but whether it happens or not is out of our control. For example, Bhuddism (and cognitive-behavioral psychology)describes that the only thing we have control over is our actions and thoughts (other fields also have used this same idea). The results or outcomes of our actions are out of our hands (as long as we have put forth out best and creative effort). Therefore, Buddhism claims that we should not worry if we have given our best. That’s all we can do. To try to manipulate the results so we get the outcome we want, often ends up in actions that may be unethical.
Mar 19, 2012 @ 10:58:08
I think a lot of people do use “try” as a CYA term. I hate that. Because when I say I’ll try, I do.
Mar 15, 2012 @ 14:13:59
excellent post Marcy – very thought provoking. LIke others have said, I think we have to do or not do until we are certain the dream is impossible.
Wayne Dyer suggests we ask ourselves “Does this feel natural to us?” if yes, then we can do. if not, it won’t happen. I find that simple question helps me avoid the ‘try’ prcoess. If something doesn’t feel natural, but I’m afraid, then I have to do it. but if it doesn’t feel natural, and i’m not afraid, I challenge myself to get on it.
thanks for making me think this morning. Now I’m back to work.
Mar 16, 2012 @ 22:37:37
“Does it feel natural to us?” Good question to use. It’s dangerous to ignore our gut instinct, and unfortunately, it’s sometimes difficult to sort out what’s our instincts talking to us and what’s just fear holding us back.
Mar 15, 2012 @ 17:48:51
I think both ideas are correct. In order to succeed, you must go in believing you can, not taking the “try” approach or attitude. On the other hand, what you say is completely true and when such things happen I think it is the universe’s way of telling us which path we should be on, verses which one we want to be on.
For all things there is a plan. We may not always like it, but it’s there.
Mar 16, 2012 @ 22:40:47
It’s a balance. I fully believe in giving our all when we test things out–trying should never be used as an excuse–but I also believe that there’s a plan that’s bigger than me. And, as you said, “We may not always like it, but it’s there.”
Mar 15, 2012 @ 18:09:21
I admit it. I’ve used that line myself, but usually it’s in the line of “trying” to exercise or whatever. It’s always been a reminder that I must give my all no matter what.
However, you’re right. We can take it too far. As a Christian I know that there will be times I want something that’s just not meant to be or that I can only get if I stop trying so hard. Sometimes you have to let things come as they may.
What a great post. Thanks!
Mar 16, 2012 @ 22:35:19
I’m glad you liked it 🙂 You’re right. We need to acknowledge that our plans might not be God’s plans. And that’s okay because what we happen to want isn’t always what’s best for us.
Mar 15, 2012 @ 19:26:24
Yoda is wrong and I always roll my eyes at that scene.
Mar 15, 2012 @ 20:39:53
“Trying is really the same as not doing it.” Love that. Love the whole post.
Although, even when dealing with other people, as in the marriage example, or with talents, we’re still doing. Do we always achieve the “end” result? i.e. a record deal or ever-lasting love? No, but in the meantime, if we are giving it all, my opinion is, we “did” our all. But I do feel there are those people who take a more “passive” stance. As in it’s a state-of-mind. Only we know, deep down in our heart, if we “did” all we could do. If we half-ass it, yes, I believe that could be considered trying. If you only give 50%, that’s probably just trying.
Great post. Really got me thinking 🙂
Mar 16, 2012 @ 22:33:40
“If we are giving it all, my opinion is we ‘did’ our all” – I love that Ingrid. Beautifully put.
Mar 15, 2012 @ 21:14:36
I think you have two things you are talking about. One is about feelings: being told or accused of failing. I agree that no one has the right to crush someone by calling them a failure in derogatory way.
The other topic is about mind. Do not try, do is about mind set for me.
There are people with disabilities who have accomplished exactly what they wanted to do because they kept doing until they found a way that worked. Writers keep writing until they find a way that works.
If you weigh a hundred pounds and want to pick up a 1000 pound chair, you will have to exercise a lot before you can come close. But to me, that’s more about setting unrealistic goals.
If you are working on achieving a goal and a physical or other problem comes up that prevents you from achieving that goal, is that failure? I think in that situation it’s about events have change, re-assess and make new goals.
I think you are right about failure. It’s okay to do something and decide it is not right for you. But if it’s something that is both realistic and something you want to do, does failure mean you should stop trying? I don’t think so. I think failure means that particular method won’t work or that goal isn’t right. You adjust and keep doing.
Not everyone can do everything. But everyone has something they can do and excel.
Mar 16, 2012 @ 05:17:51
Marcy –
I think you raise excellent points. There are things in our lives that are beyond our control. Therefore, there are legitimate “tries.” Also, “tries” are used by excuses by us sometimes – including me. I have MS and my body is quite unreliable. Therefore, many times when people ask me if we can get together, I often say I will try my best to make it. I have had enough eperiences that when I have a bad MS day not to push it or my body pushes back – HARD! There are times when I do need to push my body, though, because instead of MS fatigue, (which gets worse when I try to work through it), I may only be experiencing just normal tiredness, Tiredness – I can push through that with little consequences. So, often I have to give things a good try – promise myself that I will a “true try” – and then there are times when I cannot do it due to personal or external limitations (which you discussed). Thanks for the great post and awesome visuals!!
Mar 16, 2012 @ 05:43:21
Please also see my above response to Ryan King’s comment above. I wrote that response after writing this initial comment to Marcy, but before I read Ryan’s comment.
In other words:
1. I read Marcy’s post.
2. Wrote comment above.
3. Started reading other people’s comments and saw Ryan King’s.
4. Responded to Ryan.
5. Reponded to my comment here to ask you, the reader, to supplement my inital comment with my above response to Ryan.
I apologize for any confusion 🙂
Mar 16, 2012 @ 08:35:13
Don’t worry. It all made sense to me, and I’m thrilled that you took the time to both read my post and the comments. Some excellent points were raised 🙂
Mar 16, 2012 @ 07:47:32
A cute cartoon that illustrates your point rather well. http://www.gocomics.com/cowandboy/2012/03/16
Mar 16, 2012 @ 08:35:41
That cartoon was very cute. Thanks for sharing 🙂
Mar 16, 2012 @ 09:58:42
I think you hit the nail on the head. It’s about knowing those times when it’s important to “try” and when it’s imperative to “do” and then going forward with the best attitude possible. Life and happiness is in the living; whether you are trying or doing, as long as you are moving forward that’s what counts.
Mar 16, 2012 @ 11:03:20
I think you just perfectly summed up what I was trying to say 🙂
Mar 16, 2012 @ 14:45:05
I agree with you 100%. I have “tried” many things that I should never have attempted in the first place (one actually caused an injury because I “tried.”) I understand that if you put your mind to something – that is attainable – you can succeed. But if I “tried” to walk on water, it wouldn’t happen. I’d sink no matter how hard I “tried” or “thought about it.”
You are correct, my friend. And thank you for being honest enough to admit your inability to do certain things. I commend you! (And I think Yoda would too.)
Patricia Rickrode
w/a Jansen Schmidt
Mar 22, 2012 @ 10:41:52
Marcy, thanks for articulating this. There are times when we give our best and fail at the task. Sometimes what we learn in the experience is useful at another point in our lives. Gosh, I hate disagreeing with Yoda. Maybe his words only apply to Force-sensitives?
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Dec 31, 2012 @ 20:11:53
Marcy, in this case, “try” has different meanings. When you try, you mean it. Yoda is saying that when Luke tried what he believed to be impossible, his disbelief got in the way of actually trying. There’s nothing wrong with what you try. There’s everything wrong with how Luke “tried.” You, if you said you would try, would try to pick up that chair. And, if it turned out NOT to be a thousand pounds, but only looked like it-say, it was actually made of styrofoam-you’d discover it was actually much lighter, no matter what it looked like. You would discover if it could be lifted.
Dec 31, 2012 @ 21:03:50
Good point, Tom. Not everyone means “try” in the same way.
Jul 07, 2017 @ 18:54:16
Hi. I found this excellent article while I was reading your post about re-blogging (it was in the suggested reading at the bottom). I’d like to chime in.
You can’t assume the “doing” part simply means using yourself and your own strength. If I wanted to “lift the chair”, and it was loaded with 1000 lbs or bolted to the floor – there nothing in that statement that indicates I couldn’t pull my truck up and attach the winch to it.
Try vs. do has nothing to do with physical strength or ability.
I look at it this way. When someone asks me to “do” something, and it’s not something I would normally or naturally be able to do, my mind immediately goes to “HOW can I do this?”. I never answer, “I’ll try”. I always answer, “OK”. And, then I work on the “how”.
(Assuming the task is not dangerous or illegal, of course :).
Yoda wasn’t telling Luke he was Superman, or godlike, or anything like that. He was simply saying, “Don’t let your mental/psychological limitations get in your way”.
AKA: “Where there’s a will, there’s a way”.
Thanks for posting