What Cupid Teaches Us About Love
Image Credit: Vinicius Fujii (www.freeimages.com)
By Marcy Kennedy (@MarcyKennedy)
I’ve never been a fan of Valentine’s Day. My husband and I don’t exchange Valentine’s gifts or plan an evening out, and I think I might be a bit miffed if he bought me a box of overpriced chocolates or a marked-up bouquet of flowers that he could get for half the cost a week later. I realize I’m the exception in this. I’ve always been practical.
But it’s not just my practicality that makes me shy away from the Valentine’s Day hype.
One of the iconic symbols of Valentine’s Day is the cubby, arrow-wielding Cupid. For me, Cupid represents everything I dislike about Valentine’s Day.
Cupid has wings because lovers are flighty or fickle. Cupid is depicted as chubby and boyish because love is irrational. He’s often shown as blindfolded to represent that love is blind to the flaws of the beloved. His arrows wound the heart instantly, and nothing else is taken into consideration.
In other words, Cupid isn’t the representative of love, at least not of the kind of love that makes a marriage last. He’s the representative of infatuation, a “love” that’s swayed by the emotions and by circumstances.
Like Cupid, Valentine’s Day isn’t about love. It’s about infatuation and endorphin rushes. Anyone can woo for a day, but it takes something deeper to endure for a lifetime. Our culture likes to emphasize this day to the point where succeeding on Valentine’s Day is sometimes valued above the day-to-day sacrifices and acts that exemplify true love.
But there’s one thing I think Cupid can teach us about love. As a character in mythology, Cupid plays a minor role. His main purpose is to set the plot in motion.
Likewise, infatuation is what sets most of us on the path that will eventually lead to marriage, but it’s only the start. It’s the inciting incident. The ignition for love, but not the definition of it.
Somewhere along the way, Cupid needs to grow up. He’ll need to take off his blindfold so that he can see the flaws of his beloved and either accept them or help to overcome them. His body will need to be hardened and his wings lost by walking the path of life with someone else, enduring the challenges that come.
That’s more romantic than Valentine’s Day, not less. And it happens every single day.
How would you sum up love? What does it mean to you to love someone?
Interested in knowing when my novel is available to buy? Sign up for my newsletter. I give my newsletter subscribers exclusive discounts and freebies. I never share your email, and you can unsubscribe at any time!
I’d love to have you sign up to receive my posts by email. All you need to do is enter your email address below and hit the “Follow” botton.
Feb 10, 2015 @ 16:53:25
Brilliant, brilliant, brilliant!
I responded to your email, so I am not going to repeat what I said here. But, bottom line, Valentines Day is a farce – it sells exaggerated notions about love. Reality is TOUGH! You need to WORK to make any relationship successful, but I don’t believe our de-glamorized version of love would sell cards, would it? 😛
Thank you so much, Marcy #HUGS
Kitto
Feb 10, 2015 @ 17:39:06
Thank you for your comment and email! I couldn’t have said it better 🙂 Our de-glamorized version of love wouldn’t sell cards, but I think it lasts a lot longer. Some of the most valuable things in life are also the most difficult.
Feb 10, 2015 @ 20:11:33
This post is a refreshing relief from the year’s sappiest Hallmark holiday. Thank you so much!
Feb 11, 2015 @ 18:20:11
Thank you for stopping by. Yeah, I’m not a fan of sappy. I prefer sincere 🙂
Feb 11, 2015 @ 07:35:14
“Our culture likes to emphasize this day to the point where succeeding on Valentine’s Day is sometimes valued above the day-to-day sacrifices and acts that exemplify true love.”
Wow, there’s a lot of truth in what you’ve said Marcy. I am not a fan of Valentine’s Day either. Of course, as with so many other holidays, it’s origin is pagan. Or you say, mythology. It doesn’t teach or promote the beauty of God’s way of love which promotes a love grown out of deep respect and appreciation for each other as a couple. It’s those day-to-day sacrifices and acts that makes our love grow over time rather than the shallow love that is depicted by Cupid. And do we need a day set aside to show/prove our love for our significant other? I think not. It should be shown each and every day. That’s what a successful relationship is based on. What a lovely post Marcy! 🙂
Feb 11, 2015 @ 18:19:28
I really like the question you asked: “And do we need a day set aside to show/prove our love for our significant other?” Excellent point. We should be showing it every day. Valentine’s Day focuses very heavily (in my opinion anyway) on things that are actually easy. It’s easy to buy and give a gift. It’s easy to make a reservation or light some candles. Those don’t actually even show love. I could do those for someone I don’t care about. It wouldn’t prove anything because it doesn’t really cost anything significant. What shows true love are the things that cost us something, and those happen every day. They can’t be confined to a single day of the year.
Feb 11, 2015 @ 11:03:32
I agree… Love is more than a gesture… It takes more than a day or a moment to be meaningful.
Feb 13, 2015 @ 04:21:31
Hub and I don’t do V-Day. We view it as a made up Hallmark holiday designed to sell overpriced “love tokens” and cause unnecessary quarrels because one half of a couple didn’t get “It” right. sigh. Lasting love is made up of so much more. V-Day Cupid is the Cupid of fickle young love. Love that hasn’t yet figured itself out. How could that Cupid possibly know what will bring happiness in five years when he won’t like the same thing five minutes from now? Emotional rollercoasters are fun, sometimes. But if you never get off, you never know what it feels like to be steady.
I’d be mad too if Hub bought a bunch of too-expensive roses! ; -)
But…I’ve always loved the Greek myth of Cupid and Psyche. It’s a classic beauty and the beast tale, and all about falling in love with a person’s true self instead of the outer shell. The story shows what happens when trust is betrayed. And that trust, and love lost, can sometimes be regained.
I love this post! I’m so glad to see I’m not the only one who doesn’t celebrate the V-Day.